the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
