I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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