One girl and one boy is just not enough.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
