i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
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