I accidentally had phone sex last night
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
