Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
