"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize