Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
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