even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
