I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
