I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
soo... how was my night?
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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