butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
