jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I've blown a few things in my day
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
she told me i tasted like america
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
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