IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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