Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
