Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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