True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
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