nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
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