Im at strip club and am horny
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
