jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize
