Can Purell be used as lube?
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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