Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Randomize
