I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
