A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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