i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Randomize
