Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
