White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Randomize
