I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize