I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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