So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
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