he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
they're like a gay fantastic four
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Randomize
