his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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