Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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