@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
