Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize
