I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
how drunk are you?
Several
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
