And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
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