did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
