u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
