Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
