Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Randomize
