It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
