so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
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