you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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