I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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