He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
