My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Randomize
