I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
