Whod you bang
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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