I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
